


The Farthest Thing

by SereneSorrow



Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Space, M/M, UraIchi Week 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:46:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,986
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24475975
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SereneSorrow/pseuds/SereneSorrow
Summary: Ichigo meets a strange shopkeeper while he's searching for a particular bar and settles for tea instead.
Relationships: Kurosaki Ichigo/Urahara Kisuke
Comments: 3
Kudos: 52
Collections: UraIchi Week 2020





	The Farthest Thing

**Author's Note:**

> UraIchi Week 2020 - Day 7: Creator's Choice  
> UraIchi Week 2020 - Day 3: Different First Meetings
> 
> So this one is actually for the Day 3 prompt, and I actually wrote it on that day, but I didn't have time to post it, and then I decided not to post the Chapter 1 that I had planned for today... whatever, you can just go read it now, there are a lot of notes at the end~ :D

Some people he knew found it annoying, that the primary Earth-that-was language to survive this long in time and this far out into space was Chinese. Ichigo didn't really care, he spoke German, Chinese and English fluently and several 'alien' languages well enough to get by. He didn't mind the prominent Chinese characters dwarfing the scrawl of 'alien' pictograms and scripts on every major advertisement every time he came into any port or transport hub or whatever other kind of dock his work took him to. He just read over the names and offers and kept on with his assigned tasks, because that was all there was to it.

Some people just wouldn't leave it alone.

“I swear it gets worse every time we put in at this dump. I've half a mind to write Beaumonde off the route altogether.” The captain complained.

Ichigo tuned him out and watched the crowd in the nearest street until he heard the directive he'd been waiting for.

“Kurosaki, head round the usual places, ear to the ground. I want a full report when you get back, anything suspicious.”

Ichigo saluted and made his way down the ramp next to McAllon and Nakk Le Vaar who were apparently attending to their own business. Ichigo didn't say a word, used to keeping his thoughts to himself, being Gemischt and apparently useless and all that. Funny how he got the hands on work jobs while the specially ranked Echt (cough, McAllon, cough) were off on private business not doing any work at all, and what was more important in the long run? The intelligence Ichigo was bringing in, that's right. Beside him the two were complaining every bit as much as the captain had and Ichigo couldn't help but overhear.

“Seriously, all the good shops pulled out of this planet years ago, I can't believe we're stuck traipsing around on this backwater route while Haschwalth gets all the good assignments!” Nakk Le Vaar sneered at the aging storefronts they could already see.

“This is work, it's not supposed to be fun. That's what vacations back on the home planet are for.” McAllon replied, though her expression as she glanced at the crowd of grungy civilians and traders around them clearly showed that she felt the same as he did.

“Vacation. Like we have leave that often. Don't tell me this doesn't make you want to blow a crater in this ugly rock!” Nakk Le Vaar snapped, but settled down when McAllon threatened to punch him for raising his voice too loud as they proceeded into the crowd.

Shaking off semi-treasonous thoughts as well as his distaste for his comrades once they turned off the ramp and out of earshot, Ichigo pushed his own way through the crowd (less rudely than _some_ people even if it did scuff his formerly clean white shirt) and checked in with several officers, contacts and shopkeepers that made up his network of eyes on this planet. Everything he was hearing was right along the lines of what he was expecting, which was just irritating because he knew that the captain would want some fantastic story that could lead to them actually going somewhere and doing something for once, besides just making the rounds as they had been for nearly a year now.

Ichigo was actually looking forward to his last stop, after all of the days he'd spent cooped up in the cramped shipboard quarters with crew mates who sneered at him and knocked him into bulkheads he could really use a drink. There was always a drink offered during the information exchange and he was actually prepared to risk the cheap alcohol this time. Ichigo's pace sped up as he slipped through the crowd in a hurry, and then he turned a corner and found the bar he was planning to meet the Rample brothers in was literally gone.

Freezing in place, Ichigo gaped at the space before him. The entire building was gone without a trace, and in its place stood the oddest little shop with a green and white striped roof and overhang, topped with a sign in actual _Japanese_ of all things and nothing else. Flabbergasted, Ichigo stood and stared for a moment at the new development. Then he shook himself, straightened his shoulders, and headed for the door. So the hope of a drink was a lost cause, still, there was work to do. At the very least he needed to inquire about the Rample brothers, perhaps the proprietor of this shop would know.

***

He was _bored_...

It was such a boring _day_...

Kisuke had come to this planet mostly to annoy Soi-Fon, as it was her home planet after all, and as she was his replacement for Yoruichi's second in command after the injury that left him with a limp had discharged him from Yoruichi's forces entirely he wasn't above a bit of petty vengeance. He'd also heard that such a wild and popular port was good for business but apparently that wasn't true. Maybe it was the odd jobs thing, candy and weapons (both antique and highly advanced) on opposing walls while a few assassins worked out of the back room was perhaps a bit confusing.

With a shrug Kisuke brushed that thought away. Who didn't appreciate a 1796 light cavalry sabre while they were picking out a new laser rifle? By the same token, who didn't celebrate a bounty collected with a pound of chocolate? The people on this planet were very strange if they thought otherwise.

With another tired affectation, the over-loud sigh, Kisuke slumped over the counter and literally sprawled over its surface as he stared at the door just waiting for _someone_ to arrive. Imagine his surprise when someone did.

Straightening up rather hastily, Kisuke called out a greeting to the rather unfairly attractive young man with bright orange hair and features not out of place among the Shiba family back home. Odd, he wore a scowl that no Shiba would and was dressed in a white shirt with blue pants, nothing that anyone from Seireitei would wear. He also didn't glance twice at the merchandise for sale, instead striding purposefully up to Kisuke's counter.

“I was wondering if you could tell me what happened to the establishment that preceded your shop in this location. The last time I was on this planet I met someone who worked there and had some business arranged to follow up on.” The man said bluntly, not interested in introductions apparently.

“Ah, well the Rample brothers who owned the bar were unfortunately murdered and there was some kind of damage to the bar. No one wanted to eat the costs of repair so I purchased the lot after it was demolished.” Kisuke freely shared, drawing several conclusions about this stranger from his line of questioning.

A Quincy most likely, or certainly a citizen of Wandenreich, that most elusive of planets ensconced inside a nebula-like phenomenon that no outside explorers had yet been able to penetrate. Kisuke himself was fascinated by the idea. The man was also here on just the sort of shifty business that he could sell back to Seireitei for quite a good sum of money if he could just wheedle a few facts out of him.

“That's all I needed to know, thank you for your time.” He said with a nod while already turning to leave.

“Ah, wait a moment, you can't expect me to leave such an opportunity alone can you?” Kisuke called out, delighting in the confused look on the man's face as he turned back.

“What opportunity?”

“Why, the opportunity to join whatever information network you are here to gossip with. I happen to be well aware of some of the side business the Rample brothers had their hands in.” Kisuke suggested.

“You want to be an informant? I don't _pay_.” The man said as he tried to puzzle out Kisuke's intentions.

Kisuke watched the younger man's face as he in turn was running his eyes over Kisuke, he really was cute when he tried.

“Now now, I may be just a shopkeeper but I know an interesting story when I see one. Perhaps you'd like some tea? We can talk all about it.” Kisuke gestured aside at the door to the back rooms, grinning to himself in success when the man suspiciously stepped behind the counter.

***

“I didn't catch your name?” The shopkeeper, Urahara, asked as he set out tea in what looked like ancient cups.

“Ichigo.” He replied, leaving off the family name, it would be too revealing as an Echt Quincy bloodline.

Taking his tea, Ichigo tried not to shift nervously under the strange man's scrutiny, why anyone would so brazenly admit to illicit activities (even on _this_ planet) Ichigo couldn't fathom. Ichigo was also trying not to blush at the way Urahara's eyes darted over him and then lingered now and again, because his reputation was bad enough as it was for being Gemischt and he didn't need rumors that he too would sleep around outside his race, even if it was true. It would get around too, Ichigo knew an information broker when he saw one, he just wasn't sure why the man was playing at being so much lower on the totem pole than he must be to get away with a shop as brazen as this one.

“Non-traditional? Curious.” Urahara said _not_ to himself but somehow Ichigo didn't feel threatened, despite how many times he'd heard criticisms of his name.

“Gemischt.” Which explained everything. “Anyway, I was only meaning to ask about how business has been going, and I doubt you can tell me how the Rample's were getting on there.” Ichigo insisted.

“Hm. You're right, I didn't come to this planet until after their business concluded. I could ask around but you've already done that and apparently found nothing?” Urahara fished from behind his own teacup.

“I didn't know I'd need to be asking about _that_ , this was my last stop.” Ichigo scowled at his own drink.

“Oh dear, well if it's not pressing I might have something for you by the time you're in port again?” Urahara was enjoying this, and Ichigo felt like an amateur spymaster under his dancing gaze.

***

It really was cute, the way the boy was _trying_. Whoever had assigned him as the lead off on an underground network of informants was clearly too thickheaded to see that underhanded tactics weren't Ichigo's strength. He was personable enough despite his apparently default facial expression's gloominess but double-speak and reading between the lines weren't second nature to him even after supposed long-term exposure, not like they were to Kisuke.

Really, in terms of profit Kisuke was making a killing with this one and he didn't even know it, which led to his conundrum. Kisuke was actually considering _teaching_ the young man, at least enough so that he wouldn't be so easily mined for information himself when he did these rounds in the future.

Kisuke really _was_ bored.

He never would have allowed such a weakness even a year ago, back on his home turf and with allies and safeguards.

In fact, he would have cut his losses before he drew too much attention from what was clearly an advance reconnaissance team for the next Quincy conquest, and he certainly never would have fallen into bed with such an agent.

Such were the decisions made by bored geniuses when faced with alluring puzzles. The taste of Ichigo's _reiryoku_ on his tongue as they delighted each other was simply too tantalizing to pass up. _Reiryoku_ , a _Shinigami_ bloodline trait, and not something that a Quincy (Echt or otherwise) would so easily ignore in one of their own. Kisuke had a feeling that the next few years were going to be very interesting, and he had one more secret to sell when Seireitei came calling.

**Author's Note:**

> Somehow this wound up having the planet, name of two characters, and vague description of both a location and some history from the film Serenity (the 2005 spinoff of the Firefly tv series) in it... that was not my original intention but I got stuck on 'where, why, how' after the idea:  
> “Sci Fi future alien planets Quincy Ichigo meets soul reaper Kisuke... Seireitei planet and wandenreich(?) planet... some other planet... bar or restaurant?”  
> that is literally the idea I jotted down when trying to come up with something for the prompt, clearly the details were escaping me so I needed to borrow a foundation, ack! -.-'
> 
> So for this story, Shinigami are just the name of a race of humanoid aliens, Seireitei being their home planet whereas Wandenreich is the Quincy planet, but both were teraformed by Earth forever ago and Humans are the common ancestor. That's why alien is in 'quotes' because there are no ALIENS it's just many MANY planets of earthlings that evolved differently to survive the odd teraforming effects.
> 
> Also, the end sounds kind of manipulative, honestly I wasn't sure where the story was going and wanted to wrap it up so that's just the way the words happened, ultimately if this story continued Ichigo and Kisuke would pretty much immediately fall in love and Ichigo would defect and live in 'exile' with Kisuke here at the shop so whatever, but Kisuke saying that he'll sell the secret of Ichigo being part Shinigami is basically just his weird way of saying that he's going to tell the Shiba clan that he found a long lost relative of theirs and do they want to say hi, he's just all sneaky and 'how can this also benefit me' about it.
> 
> Also, Ichigo DOES NOT speak Japanese, because who knows which languages survived and whatnot. He was raised on the Quincy planet that either speaks German or a new language of their own, he only knows Chinese and English for work.
> 
> And as far as why I chose the Quincy characters that I did goes, I KNOW I read AT LEAST half of that arc of the manga, but I don't REMEMBER any of these people!!! WHY??? so I looked at a wiki list of what their powers are and compared them to the Serenity characters/skills:
> 
> Meninas McAllon (superstrength) = River, psychic assassin  
> Askin Nakk Le Vaar (lethal dose control) = Simon, doctor  
> Jugram Haschwalth (Misfortune Redirection) = random other spaceship captain who has all the luck with assignments


End file.
